Homeland Security fearmongering graphics

If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.

By Turoks

The US government has a new website, www.ready.gov. It’s another attempt at scare mongering in the style of the old “duck and cover” advice after WWII.

The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything. Here are a few interpretations.

Emperor George and the Lost War in Iraq

By Susan Lindauer

Once upon a time there was a President named George who wanted to be Emperor. (Not a bad idea. He was a lousy President. He really needed a different job.)

President George had traveled to Mexico—once. So he figured the whole world was pretty much like Texas. He thought about it for, oh, five minutes. What he needed was a country far, far away to invade. Surely those foreigners would be charmed by his folksy swagger (being more primitive and all). They’d appreciate him more than those Gosh Darn Americans, who had awfully high expectations of a President. Why, he imagined these foreigners would bow and scrape and wow over his every golf shot.

Corbett’s satire on 9/11 (video)

By Corbett Report

Everything you ever wanted to know about the 9/11 conspiracy theory in under 5 minutes.

David Icke Ruins Mel Gibson’s Day:

A video by Jay4louise2

Now Mel has woken up to the truth,are you still convinced by the official 9/11 story?

Barred From 9/11?

Sarkozy honors French Foreign Legion with Order of Merit of Al-Qaeda medal

Satire by InfoWars Ireland

President Nicolas Sarkozy of France has bestowed a new Honor upon the famed parachute regiment 2^eme Rep of the French Foreign Legion.

Legionnaires from the elite outfit have been busy lately helping Al Qaeda in the western mountains of Libya, and more recently involved in the NATO special forces storming of Tripoli, where NATO warplane bombardment, along with special forces from the US Military, British SAS and a few other puppet Arab States like Qatar stormed into the capital Tripoli and terrified the inhabitants.

Terrorists Attack Jefferson Memorial with Deadly Dance Moves

By lonelantern
The Reality Report

Terrorists struck the Jefferson Memorial on May 28th in an apparently coordinated effort. Early reports revealed this coordinated attack carries the signature of past Al Qaeda attacks using multiple targets and unrelated agents. However, it is unclear if dance attacks affected other national monuments but authorities have been placed on high alert.

Law Enforcement officers on duty at the time acted swiftly to diffuse the dance threat before damage could be done to the memorial and the tourists at the site. The terrorists are now in the custody of Washington DC officials and are being interrogated.

Rap News: Osamacide

By The Juice News

Because they’ve embargoed this until May 25, instead of embedding the video, we provide the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6O6sM2Shok

Episode 8. It’s the end of an era. The decade which opened with a ferocious attack in the United States of America, closes with the announcement of the death of its greatest and most conveniently disney-like villain, Usama Bin Laden.

In a decade which has been dominated by the Empire Strikes Back, our affable and dextrous host Robert Foster invites us to scrutinise the events shrouding the killing of this twentyfirst-century Goldstein.

Hat in Hand

Disclosure 2011 (video ad)

Intro by Forbidden Knowledge TV

You might need to be a proud owner of a tinfoil hat to get all of the conspiracy jokes in this cute, animated short, pretending to be a fake advertisement targeted to the would-be controllers of the world, in a spoof of a 1950s laundry detergent commercial geared towards housewives:

Hey! Are your ideas for global takeover falling apart?
Are you losing sleep over humanity’s mass-awakening?
Is false-flag terrorism fizzling out?
Global Warming gone cold on ya?

Well, don’t give up! Get Disclosure (Brain Washing Powder)! You’ll be able to unite mankind with a phony problem and enslave them with a One World Government — and Taxes!

God Says Bird Deaths are His Doing

Michael Collins

(Washington, DC) The galactic deity, also known as God, offered an exclusive interview to Dan Rather, yesterday. He cleared up the story about the the thousands of dead birds that fell from the sky over central Arkansas last week and hinted at his plans for some more surprises across the United States.

Dan Rather: Your holiness, what’s happening with the dead birds in Arkansas?

God: Please, Dan, just call me God. I decided to create some serious wish fulfillment for certain people in the United States.

DR: I don’t understand?

WikiLeaks to release Percy Cummings arrest documents

By Dead Serious News

Hours before being placed on Interpol’s most wanted list, Julian Assange announced that WikiLeaks was going to release thousands of documents related to the recent arrest of Percy Cummings, who is charged with sexually assaulting a TSA agent during a pat-down.

Metallic Ink Clothing: ‘For when unwarranted searches go too far’

Amendment IV
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

By Scott Beale
Laughing Squid

4th Amendment Wear is a series of underclothes that have the Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution printed on them with metallic ink that so that it will show up when worn through a TSA X-Ray machine.

Fit Hits Shan At 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue

By Richard Volaar

Fit hits shan, shan generates sparks, sparks cause fire, Fotomat burns down, no film at eleven.

Joe Biden has been tasked to consider invoking the 25th Amendment against Barry Soetoro, our beloved Narcissist-in-Chief, Barak Hussein Obama.

Dear Jon to Dear Keith

By Richard Volaar

[originally published in early 2010, recently edited and revised due to Keith Olbermann’s effective dismissal from MSNBC]

You may be (fill-in-the-blank-stare) to know that, with respect to your recent lampooning of Keith Olbermann, I have a difference of opinion with your perspective.

While it has certainly been true that Mr. Olbermann has flagrantly used hyperbole in describing the behavior and character of Washington politicians, lobbyists and other leaders from the political “right” in our country, I believe his hyperbolic statements were perfectly appropriate.  Under the present circumstances that continue to exist within the United States of America, not only is hyperbole warranted, but screaming in the public square at the top of one’s lungs is to be encouraged. 

Announcing The Bagel Party

By John P. Kusumi

I’m starting the Bagel Party.

Like the Tea Party, the Bagel Party is not formalized into an authentic third party.

In fact, no one needs more than a one-pager to describe this party, and I can hold down the fort as a one-man political party (for now).

Ideas On The Path Toward Revolutionary Regression: Issue 1

What's A Little Blasphemy Among Friends At The Y?

Think of these tidbits entreats, open-ended brainstorming sessions between me and the voices in my head.  Short and sweet,  usually after work, caught in traffic on the way home to be caught in domestic “bliss,” I sense a flash of inspiration comingled with the justifiable ire of a former citizen of a democratic republic that has since gone mad with Mussolini-style fascism.

First, we need:

Scan WOW: Change your physique for TSA

By WakeUp2NWO

Heck of a Job B P

How It Is (In the Gulf)

BUZZ THIS

By Richard Volaar

ABC News lies lies and tells more what else is new I say it as I hear it murmured in the oil.  John Caylor has breathing difficulty breathing and is moving will be moving to the Beltway from Pensacola where he can breathe where he can sigh and call out like he sees it murmured in the mud murmuring Wayne Madsen.

Charlie Crist may declare a state emergency state as benzene wafts then crawls then muddles then chokes the murmuring in the mud murmuring in the oil I say it like I hear it while the brown pelicans dance no they dance not no they’re dark with oil hold their wings up high to ooze back into mud to drop down from high to soar to fish to float to die in heaving globs of tar I say it like I see it.